storing sunny and cloudy memories

after 1 week or probably 10 days in-denial coupled with my stubborn attitude that refuses to stop smoking, i  had told my colleague that i felt different and that i might be pregnant. of course, he (my colleague) was jumping joy as if he's the one carrying for the next 9 months was utterly excited. i couldn't be bothered at that time because drowning with work, reports, stress, i was already late for dinner with the 'sex and city girls' (that is another topic, who are the sex and the city girls). so we rushed for dinner and on the way out there was a pharmacy and he told me to quickly grab the pregnancy test and off we go. funny enough, i took the cheapest non-branded test just because after the miscarriage and months trying, i wouldn't want to buy the most expensive test and be disappointed. went for dinner with the girls, and half-way through our dinner i told them that my period is 10 days late and i might be pregnant. sex and the city girls being sex and the cit...

Alright, what happened after April 2016? Today as I am writing this entry, it is officially 21st December 2017. I have decided to start again (blogging) not because it is currently a trend for mothers to blog or anything like that. It is purely because I hope or want my son to be able to read when he grows older. Or for me, personally to reminisce about my son when I am older. So, what happened after April 2016? I was announced by my Gynae that I was pregnant, 6 weeks or so. So her medication and what she had asked us to do, worked! We were over the moon excited. Beyond word excited! We didn't tell a lot of people only close family and friends. We had our first check-up and we heard the heart beat. It was loud and it was the first time of me listening to a heart beat of a tiny dot inside my womb. Again, went back home all excited and filled with joy. At about the 2nd check-up, I think week 10 during the ultrasound, there was no heart beat. The doctor scanned everywhere but ju...