life is unfair!
life is unfair. hate my life when its in a mess. now its in a mess. why cant my life be fair? why must i get all the punishment?i've been living for 20 years and its never been fair. i just can't put in words on how i feel now. i just feel like shouting, screaming or maybe get prozac. i think im depressed, emotionally abused, or mentally ill. i know in life that if i want something i have to work hard for it but i've worked hard for it and what do i get? nothing. all i want is to be accepted. sometimes i don't even know where i belong. i don't even know what the hell is wrong but i know something is wrong somewhere. i don't know who i am anymore. i've been nice, happy, hardworking, and the list goes on, but why can't they see that. why must they see the ugly side of me. the girl who i was 7 years ago. im not that stupid rebellious girl anymore. why? enough said.
anyway, yesterday i went out with this cousin of mine to ou. we had lunch and usual routine, coffee bean. went back to my auntie's place. hang out there til my grandma arrives then i went back home. at night, went to summit to pick up the olymbus camera. stupid camera. then hang out at ravi taipan. wanted to watch cinderella story but i was too tired to open my eyes.
today i woke up early, 1130am and had lunch with the girls at tomyam. then went to see tara. she's so adorable and cute and sepet. she's only 6 months old. i feel like biting her. then went to coffee bean with the girls. had dinner at chatters because it was my cousins birthday. a lot of people came. the food was not enough, because of the people there. i know most of them but i didn't talk to them. i just smiled. i feel like an ugly idiot there. the reason i didn't want to talk to them is because i rejected them on friendster. basically i didn't accept them as my friend on the friendster request. so i was scared that they'll ask me about it, so i just kept quiet and talk to afzal. harris and pisang was there too. harris, pisang and zairi had to bring up the sushi topic in front of afzal. i really don't know whether he's comfortable talking about it or not. harris, pisang and zairi had to make fun of the sushi topic just because the guy was there. pisang told him that i wanted the birthday cake, so that guy gave me a big slice of cake with fruits on it and afzal got a small one. i really don't know if he's comfortable or not. i hope he's ok with it. come on, sushi thingy happened 3 years ago. then, me and afzal went to dome to meet azman, boyot, naq, irma and wabi. i had fun there at dome. afzal was funny. i just love when he makes me laugh.
today i just got to know that i have to most busuk hati friend. this person is bad and nobody can do anything about it. so busuk hati that even the closest friend can't stand this person. i wish that i never knew this person. thank god im not that close to this person. if this person is not happy about what we do, tell it to our face. and one more thing, DO NOT TALK BAD ABOUT MY GOOD FRIENDS, MISS KNOW-IT-ALL!!!!
anyway, yesterday i went out with this cousin of mine to ou. we had lunch and usual routine, coffee bean. went back to my auntie's place. hang out there til my grandma arrives then i went back home. at night, went to summit to pick up the olymbus camera. stupid camera. then hang out at ravi taipan. wanted to watch cinderella story but i was too tired to open my eyes.
today i woke up early, 1130am and had lunch with the girls at tomyam. then went to see tara. she's so adorable and cute and sepet. she's only 6 months old. i feel like biting her. then went to coffee bean with the girls. had dinner at chatters because it was my cousins birthday. a lot of people came. the food was not enough, because of the people there. i know most of them but i didn't talk to them. i just smiled. i feel like an ugly idiot there. the reason i didn't want to talk to them is because i rejected them on friendster. basically i didn't accept them as my friend on the friendster request. so i was scared that they'll ask me about it, so i just kept quiet and talk to afzal. harris and pisang was there too. harris, pisang and zairi had to bring up the sushi topic in front of afzal. i really don't know whether he's comfortable talking about it or not. harris, pisang and zairi had to make fun of the sushi topic just because the guy was there. pisang told him that i wanted the birthday cake, so that guy gave me a big slice of cake with fruits on it and afzal got a small one. i really don't know if he's comfortable or not. i hope he's ok with it. come on, sushi thingy happened 3 years ago. then, me and afzal went to dome to meet azman, boyot, naq, irma and wabi. i had fun there at dome. afzal was funny. i just love when he makes me laugh.
today i just got to know that i have to most busuk hati friend. this person is bad and nobody can do anything about it. so busuk hati that even the closest friend can't stand this person. i wish that i never knew this person. thank god im not that close to this person. if this person is not happy about what we do, tell it to our face. and one more thing, DO NOT TALK BAD ABOUT MY GOOD FRIENDS, MISS KNOW-IT-ALL!!!!
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